#HD12

On The Big Bible Project this morning we ran a story about the hashtag we’re seeking to get going, #HD12, which stands for Hopes & Dreams for 2012.

2011

2011 has been a difficult year. In February 2009 I qualified as a Life Coach, aspects of which have affected much of my practice within work, but also my life itself. Two quotes which stuck with me from the sessions:

  • “There’s no point painting the wall if it needs knocking down”.
  • “Sometimes you have to go through the shit, it’s just a case of finding a way of landing in 3ft, rather than 6ft of shit”.

Shortly afterwards I was put on antidepressants (yes, I know we’re not supposed to talk about that, but how are we supposed to support people in dealing with it if we don’t accept that it’s an illness that needs treatment), and started to meet with a counsellor to talk through how my life is the way it is…

Who gets depression?

It’s partly because I have been told so many times “you’re the last person I would have thought suffered from depression” that I thought I’d write this …

This Christmas I picked up Christopher Cantopher ‘The Curse of the Strong‘, a book that many others had identified as particularly helpful and this assessment of the ‘personality type’ that he identifies as most likely to struggle is striking (not the ‘should pull their socks up’ kinda person):

  • (moral) strength
  • reliability
  • diligence
  • strong conscience
  • strong sense of reliability
  • a tendency to focus on the needs of others before one’s own
  • sensitivity
  • vulnerability to criticism
  • self-esteem dependent on the evaluation of others (I’m not so sure about that one)
He identifies how depression, so often classified as a ‘mental disorder’ can actually be identified as a physical disorder, with the synaptic nerves in the limbic system under so much pressure that they snap … and need time to heal:

http://www.uniview.co.uk/acatalog/info_8_1057.html

Things need to heal properly before putting too much pressure back on … otherwise relapse, potentially worse, will occur… Currently, I’m still on mine… it allows me to continue to be Bex…

Failing Well

A couple of great quotes from Cantopher’s book:

Now, what’s really hard but correspondingly rewarding is to fail well. This means taking on a range of tasks, experiences and challenges, understanding that you will win some and lost some, forgiving yourself your failures and learning from them. This way you develop a life that is rich in texture and free from fear.

followed up by:

While I had succeeded in avoiding failure, he had embraced it, with the result that he had a new skill, at which he was clearly having a great time. In order to achieve success that is worthwhile and wide-ranging, you must first learn to fail well. Every happy person I have met has achieved this. It doesn’t though, mean making your life a struggle to achieve the impossible.

Making Decisions

On my Christmas/New Year holiday in Egypt last year I knew I had to make a big decision… not as a New Year Resolution (I don’t make those, if life coaching has taught me anything else, it’s that we need to make changes when the time is right, not at some random time in the calendar, although time off in the New Year can help us take time to think) … but moving forward… I’ve made huge steps in 2011… but I’m not good at congratulating myself! In many ways, I should congratulate myself that I managed to have nearly 6 days doing ‘nothing’ over Christmas, but instead I’m looking at what I still haven’t finished for 2011, and stressing about 2012!

So, what ARE my hopes and dreams for 2012?

Anyway, this was the original plan for my post… so what do I know I have to look forward to in 2012:

I’ll probably remember more, but for now… let’s get some fresh air!!

drbexl
Life Explorer, HE/learning, Christian, cultural history, WW2 posters: Keep Calm & Carry On, digital world, coach, ENFP, @digitalfprint, @ww2poster

5 Replies to “#HD12”

  1. Claire

    Well done you!

    Depression is heavy going, and I’m glad you sought help. In 2011, I managed to come off my anti-anxiety medication totally and halve my depression medication. This for me was a huge step. I know that I will never “recover” as depression can reoccur at any time, but I will be able to continue to be me and to live a more enjoyable life. Accepting you have this illness is the first step to learning to live with it!

    I wish you all the best for 2012, and I sincerely hope you do take more time to relax and to treat yourself. Try Groupon for last minute deals on treats that are just for YOU!

    I am terribly proud of you Bex! xx

    Reply
  2. drbexldrbexl Post author

    Thanks Charly… and also to others who throughout this year have supported me in so many different ways. Bit more ‘shit’ to get through in 2012… but every day making steps to move forward!

    Reply
  3. Claire

    With my boyfriend’s support, I have been edging towards Winchester, slowly but surely. It is one of my many goals in 2012 to meet you for a coffee and a catch up, but it might not be until the summer!!

    Reply
  4. Julia

    Glad to hear you took some time off over Xmas, Bex. I recognise some of what you mention (e.g. getting paperwork and website sorted out!)

    It looks like you’ve got lots of lovely plans for 2012 – that’s something I need to get sorted out, as I’ve realised having a plan would help to make life simpler.

    Have a wonderful New Year’s Eve, and I look forward to catching up with you in 2012!

    Reply
  5. drbexldrbexl Post author

    Looking forward to seeing you closer to Winch Charly! And Julia, yes … looking forward to catching up 2012 🙂

    I have already sorted out my kitchen cupboards/defrosted the freezer!!

    Just seen on another blog:.. the danger of new year resolutions in having ‘too much faith in your future self’

    “I’ll skip the gym today, but I’m sure I’ll go tomorrow. I’ll put this on my credit card today, but no more shopping for a month. I don’t want to get started on the project now, but I’ll tackle it first thing in the morning. The more people have faith in their futures selves, the more likely they are to indulge today. In fact, just knowing you’ll have the chance to choose again tomorrow increases the chance you’ll choose habit or vice today.”

    http://www.danpink.com/archives/2012/01/how-to-make-a-new-years-non-resolution?utm_source=twitterfeed&utm_medium=twitter

    Reply

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